Reaching Out: The Three Movements of the Spiritual Life

For anyone starting or exploring their spirituality, this is a great book to get you headed in the correct direction.
As a novice in my spiritual development, I have found this book to be a very useful guide.

This book stimulated discussion and growth in our weekly spirit group. The three movements are: from loneliness to solitude, from hostility to hospitality, and from illusion to prayer. Key is this quote: "We do not have to deny or avoid our loneliness, our hostilities, and our illusions. To the contrary: When we have the courage to let these realities come to our full attention, understand them and confess them, then they can slowly be converted into solitude, hospitality and prayer." Discussing this book helped our group develop the author's habit of owning up to our weaknesses, and helped us to realize more deeply that spiritual maturity is not a life without weaknesses but an ability to acknowledge them and be open to their healing.

Henri Nouwen provides a plan for living a spiritual life and attaining the ultimate goal of unity with God. His plan is laid out in three "movements": (a) Loneliness to solitude, (b) hostility to hospitality, and (c) illusion to prayer.

In addressing loneliness to solitude, our relationship with ourselves, Nouwen points out that "it is this most basic human loneliness that threatens us and is so hard to face" (1976, p. 26). We do everything we can to avoid pain; physical, mental, and emotional. We must learn to enter into our loneliness and change it to one of solitude. The beginning of spiritual life is a movement from "restless senses to restful spirit" (p. 34). Solitude is seen as an ". . . inner quality that does not depend on physical isolation" (p. 37).

Our relationship to other people is described in Nouwen's second movement, hostility to hospitality. Here Nouwen identifies three types of relationships: parents and children, teachers and students, and professionals and clients/patients (p. 80). In all relationships ". . . the concept of hospitality can help us to see that we are called not to own but to serve each other and to create the space where that is possible" (p. 97). The Christian witness has two inseparable sides, receptivity and confrontation, that must remain balanced. While receptivity leads to neutrality without confrontation, so confrontation leads to aggression without receptivity (p. 99). "Real receptivity asks for confrontation because space can only be welcoming space when there are clear boundaries, and boundaries are limits between which we define our own position" (p. 98).

In Nouwen's third movement, he discusses illusion to prayer. This is the movement where Nouwen says we reach out to God. It is the movement that ". . . makes possible the movements from loneliness to solitude and from hostility to hospitality and leads us to the core of the spiritual life" (p. 114). Illusion is the idea that we see ourselves as immortal. We know we all will die, yet we tend to eternalize ourselves and our world. Nouwen states that there are two visible symptoms of our illusion: sentimentality and violence. Sentimentality is seen in a clinging relationship where individuals cling so hard to others and believe they cannot live without the other. "This intimacy can lead to depression and despair when it is masked with immortality" (p. 118). Violence is shown in our relationships when we treat others, and ourselves, as property ". . . to be defended or conquered and not as gifts to be received: p. 119). Moving from illusion to prayer is possible because of the gift God gave us through his son Jesus Christ. Through Jesus' sacrifice we can have an intimate relationship with God because of the Spirit he sent to us. Nouwen continues talking about how prayer has been studied and approached. He gives three rules that are always observed in Scripture (Luke 10:42): "a contemplative reading of the word of God, a silent listening to the voice of God, and a trusting obedience to a spiritual guide" (p. 135). How these are implemented may be different for different people.

While I can agree with Nouwen's movements, I felt something missing throughout the first movement. I feel more should have been noted that our loneliness is a direct result of our separation from God. It is when we are in touch with God, focused on Him, we can find solitude and contentment with ourselves. Nouwen talked a lot about facing the pain and becoming comfortable with ourselves, but I felt like he failed to show that it is in coming close to God that we are able to face the pain and feel comfortable with ourselves. That movement didn't feel complete.

Nouwen's suggestion that prayer is a gift is an interesting concept (p. 123). I've never thought of prayer in that way, but it certainly makes sense in that it is what God offers to us as a way of communicating with Him. The innate longing we have to be intimate with God is only experienced as we spend time with Him through our acceptance of Jesus Christ. Prayer offers us that opportunity to commune with God. I do agree that we each have a way of praying that works best for us.

Not a great Nouwen book, the later ones are much better. Found his writing rather pedantic.

Recently, I discovered Nouwen's spiritual writings, and this, the latest book I have stumbled upon, has not disappointed. The author combines deep faith and a truly personal style of writing with profound psychological truths. 'Reaching Out' deals with two common themes in Christian spirituality the levels or stages of spiritual growth and the places where this growth may take place in relation with self, neighbor, and God. His take on these questions is quite unique and well worth considering for anyone serious about growing in peace with self, in hospitable service to neighbor, and in deeper love and union with God.

Used for a class

Well written. Brings you along in a good way.

May me think about doing something that I have yet to experience.

Great book for our Lenten book study!

Excellent book!!