All the Living and the Dead: From Embalmers to Executioners, an Exploration of the People Who Have Made Death Their Life's Work

This book is not for everyone and certainly not the squeamish but as a physician in my early 60s I found it remarkably fascinating and learned many aspects of “death “ (despite seen many dead bodies starting with Nancy my med school cadaver) that I had never really thought of. I did not appreciate some of the authors anti-catholic statements in the book and ?? Her use of the word “baby” versus fetus in her chapter about midwives working with mothers who sustained early pregnancy loss. In this Row v Wade era - which is it ? Am glad I saw the Ny Times review and picked this one up!

Not for the squeamish, this deep dive into the world of the dead is simultaneously an excellent investigative report and a luminous, philosophical treatise. Beautifully written with insight and compassion, the author gives voice and dignity to the people behind the scenes of the death trade, in professions that are rarely mentioned. I couldn’t put it down.

I just cannot say enough positive things about this book. I learned so much about the death practices and industry. I plan to read it again because it was so insightful and educational. You will NOT be disappointed by this read.

I just cannot say enough positive things about this book. I learned so much about the death practices and industry. I plan to read it again because it was so insightful and educational. You will NOT be disappointed by this read.

“I didn’t fear death, I was captivated by it.”

“We are surrounded by death. It is in our news, our novels, our video games…It is in our nursery rhymes, our museums, our movies about beautiful murdered women… Death is everywhere, but it’s veiled, or it’s fiction. Just like in video games, the bodies disappear. But the bodies have to go somewhere.”

Hayley Campbell was interested in the details of death at a very young age. Trained as a journalist, she delves into people who work in the ‘death industry’ and make our lives easier. All the Living and the Dead is very readable (limited medical terms) and well organized. Her writing is clear and vivid (but not too vivid! ; - ) Chapters cover the jobs of Funeral Director, Crime Scene Cleaner, Disaster Victim Identifiers, Embalmers, Executioners, Grave diggers, Crematorium Operators, Pathologists and more. A bit gruesome in a few spots like the autopsy section, (skim or skip over if you need to, the book is very worth your time), it is tastefully written, always respectful of the dead and the people who work with them, helping us manage our minds and hearts.

Campbell’s thoroughly researched stories are both unique and interesting. She always brings personal elements into the narrative. This talented writer pleads for families to have choices in viewing victim’s remains and in how they grieve loved ones. The end of the book contains notes and sources, including further reading broken down into helpful categories. An index is included.

Hayley Campbell narrates her own book. Her excellent pacing and clear voice create a warm listening experience. Her Australian/ English(?) accent add charm. I particularly enjoyed being able to listen while I was walking.

This book is awesome. I had been looking for another book like Mary roaches Stiff forever and I finally found it! And Hayley Campbell is phenomenal.
I read the ebook but I'll be buying the paperback too. Do I recommend? YES. I. DO!
More 🙏 please.

Death is a frightening subject for many people. Most of the time we’d rather not look at what happens after we die. However, there are people whose job it is to deal with the dead. From embalmers to pathologists, homicide detectives and others. These people face death every day. This book is about them.

The book is very well researched. The author interviewed many people in the death industry and found they have as many and varied thoughts about death as the rest of us. From gravediggers who fear the cemetery at night to a crematory worker who won’t dress a cadaver because it is too personal, these are real people whose job it is to see the rest of us to a comfortable resting place.

I hadn’t thought much about the death industry until I read this book. I knew about homicide detectives, coroners and pathologists from a fascination with murder mysteries, but this was real. The author did an excellent job of bringing the other people, like embalmers and executioners to life. If you’re fascinated by what happens to bodies after death, this is an excellent book.

I received this book from St. Martin’s Press for this review.

This book took me exponentially longer to get through than most. But I’m glad I kept with it and kept coming back to it. I had to stop and read a different book several times throughout…something frivolous and fiction. This author takes you through a very methodical and well thought out journey through death and the workers who do the jobs after we die. It’s a clinical experience and also an emotional experience as the author does not leave out her questions or emotions throughout the process. Very well done!

Fascinating. I learned so much. To me this book isn’t morbid at all. It is the reality of death and many people who spend their adult lives in the industry of the dying. It happens to all of us of course.

Real Rating: 4.5* of five, rounded up

A book with a truly tragic genesis, the author losing a baby at birth; but it led her to look for her grief to be assuaged in discovering the connective tissue in our society's death industry. She made a terrible tragedy into a very interesting study and came away with the kind of book that many of us read with squeamishness as we're utterly disconnected from death.

No one doesn't think about death, and dying; and, as we've professionalized and medicalized every part of the process, we're going to the bookshelf for our answers. Luckily there are those among us who like learning things and then explaining them. (As long as they're not men, they're lauded for it.) Author Hayley Campbell did a major research project in this book's genesis. It comes across more in the endnotes...they're extensive. I realize I'm very much in the minority here, but I prefer endnotes with spiffy little superscript numbers that, in ebooks, function as hyperlinks; I'm perfectly willing to navigate away from the page when I want to know something's source. But la, the wishes and the wants of one not the author, or the editor, are mere wing-flappings of the tiniest of midges. (I'm waxing lyrical. Send help!) Encountering, for example, the saline hydrocremation process was something I wanted to know more about right then and there...but you can bet your sweet bippy I've bookmarked the UK WIRED Magazine story for future discovery.

A less delightful thing that somewhat tarnished my reading experience, and is the source of the missing half-star on the rating about, was the lived experience of her tragic loss of a baby. It was very, very present in the text. It is a loss second to none in the world for painful permanence. As such it felt, to be honest, overused as a rhetorical device. This is a subjective measure, and I freely acknowledge that a recently bereaved parent might find this inclusion unobtrusive, or positively helpful. I did not.

The other side of that coin, however, was my discovery that there are certain souls, who if there is a god deserve a total and complete remission from their sins, who specialize in bereavement midwifery. How very, very beautiful a soul those people must possess. How vast their reserves of kindness and empathy must be. And how deeply glad I am that they do this job.

Executioners, on the utterly other hand, aren't people I think should be employed. I have this wacky idea that killing people is wrong. Killing them as a profession is not one iota different in my own eyes to being a serial killer. And that, mes vieux, is that. (The executioner interview was interesting, I will admit, but changed my opinion not one jot.)

While I'm sure others might feel triggered at a frank discussion of the process of one's body's cessation of function, it fascinated me. It is a sad truth that most people in today's Western, privileged society have little or nothing to do with their dying fellow beings. They're the ones most in need of this book's honesty. I fear they won't pick it up and I truly advise you, should you be so unfortunate as to face your own mortality in an imminent way, to read and gift this fascinating story of what dealing with death truly entails.

I will always advocate for the "it's better to know than to wonder and fear" end of the information-reading spectrum. Author Hayley makes the process of educating yourself about the aftermath of dying as painless and as compelling as is, for example, one of the mysteries or thrillers that so many of us devour.