Asking for It: The Alarming Rise of Rape Culture--and What We Can Do about It
Asking for It: The Alarming Rise of Rape Culture--and What We Can Do about It book cover

Asking for It: The Alarming Rise of Rape Culture--and What We Can Do about It

Kindle Edition

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$10.99
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Da Capo Lifelong Books
Publication Date

Description

AV Club, 8/19/15 "It's less depressing than it might sound, in part because of Harding's funny and occasionally sarcastic style, and for something so full of facts and figures, it's a pretty enthralling read. This book probably isn't going to get through the thick skulls of true rape apologists, but it is a good read if you keep hearing the term “rape culture” and don't really know what it means, or if you're enraged by the media that calls Patrick Kane a 'target' of a rape investigation instead of a 'subject' of one." Bitch Magazine , 9/2/15 “ Asking For It offers a smart, concise, and surprisingly funny contribution to the dialogue on patriarchy, misogyny, and rape.” Library Journal , 9/1/15 “Harding's book serves as a welcome addition to the conversation…she doesn't mince words…meticulously documented…Harding writes with courage and passion that may rankle some readers—which might not be an entirely bad thing.”" Asking for It is a must-read for anyone who cares about ending sexual violence. Kate Harding takes on politicians, the media, and commonly held myths in a way that's accessible for antiviolence experts and novices alike. This is a timely and brilliant book that will put a much-needed dent in rape culture."—Jessica Valenti, author of The Purity Myth and He's a Stud, She's a Slut "[A]n unflinching and nuanced map of a culture in crisis; Harding's singular voice makes it a page-turner. It's required reading for anyone who wants to know why there's so much fuss about rape culture these days, as well as for everyone who wants to do something about it."—Jaclyn Friedman, editor, Yes Means Yes Chicago Reader , 1/2/15 “[Harding] has an amazing capacity for transforming her outrage into clear, considered arguments.” Bustle, 8/27/15 “Harding skillfully breaks down the factors that have converged to create the United States' rape culture. Asking For It mixes statistics and research with true stories that show our flawed collective attitude toward sexual assault, resulting in a book that will leave you both outraged and inspired to make change happen.” Slate, 8/20/15 " Asking for It serves as a useful reminder of why we still need books—even nonfiction books—in the age of the Internet. Just the sheer volume of stories and examples Harding collects in one place is disquieting and extremely convincing in a way that getting it in pieces through the day-to-day grind of Internet reading will never accomplish. Harding doesn't shy away from tough topics, especially when it comes to false rape reporting. To be clear, this book is not a chronicle of depressing stories of sexual assault, which would be a miserable read. Harding isn't here simply to register the existence of crime; she is working as a cultural critic, focusing on the cultural response to and understanding of sexual assault more than the crimes themselves. Luckily for the reader, Harding has a wicked sense of humor." Los Angeles Times , 8/23/15 "Deft and timely... Informative and informal, the book is a smart, impassioned and well-researched agenda for a strictly no-nonsense understanding of rape culture." New York Journal of Books 8/25/15 “Insightful and provocative book…Using news from current popular culture, as well as her own experiences, Harding has put together a no-holds-barred examination of the social phenomenon of rape culture…Everyone should read this book no matter their gender identification, sexual orientation, religious, or political beliefs….The book is written accessibly and intelligently, without hyperbole, and is a sincere work of scholarship no library or bookshelf should be without.” The Week , 10/9/15 “Journalist Kate Harding, who possesses ‘a finely honed impatience with bull----,' has produced a valuable primer on sexual violence in America. It makes clear how rarely rapists are held accountable and how much damage is done by the popular beliefs that false rape accusations are common and that the line between consent and refusal is ambiguous. If the concept of ‘rape culture' baffles you, this is the book to read.” --This text refers to the paperback edition. Kate Harding is the coeditor of Nasty Women: Feminism, Resistance, and Revolution in Trump's America , coauthor of Lessons from the Fat-o-Sphere and a contributor to The Book of Jezebel . The cohost of the Feminasty podcast, she lives in Florida. --This text refers to the paperback edition.

Features & Highlights

  • In the era of #metoo, a clear-eyed, sharp look at rape culture, sexual assault, harassment and violence against women--and what we can do about it.
  • "A timely and brilliant book." (Jessica Valenti) Every seven minutes, someone in America commits a rape. And whether that's a football star, beloved celebrity, elected official, member of the clergy, or just an average Joe (or Joanna), there's probably a community eager to make excuses for that person. In
  • Asking for It
  • , Kate Harding combines in-depth research with a frank, no-holds-barred voice to make the case that twenty-first-century America supports rapists more effectively than it supports victims. From institutional failures in higher education to real-world examples of rape culture, Harding offers ideas and suggestions for how we, as a society, can take sexual violence much more seriously without compromising the rights of the accused.

Customer Reviews

Rating Breakdown

★★★★★
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(221)
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15%
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★★
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Most Helpful Reviews

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Rape Culture Needs to Stop!

This is a review by my son, Matthew Corrigan.
In this enlightening thesis of a novel, Kate Harding explores the modern-day implications of rape culture and its effect on our everyday lives. This includes an exploration of the colleges we attend, the tv shows we watch, the comedians we laugh at, and the video games we play. They all affect how we treat victims of sexual assault and how we look at individual cases of rape, where our society tends to blame the victim and to think of ways in which the victim could have prevented the assault, rather than remember that the victim had a crime committed against her and not the other way around.

Just as it has for others, this book has enlightened me to the sociological problems that today's society faces. For example, before reading this book, when I heard anything about the Bill Cosby cases, I tended to look for ways to discredit the victims as either gold diggers or attention-seekers. But now I see the women as victims of a terrible crime and Bill Cosby as a man who needs to be put on trial for his actions, and luckily that's happening as I write this review.

I recommend this book to anyone who believes that women are to blame for crimes against them, or to anyone who has been sexually assaulted or has a friend or relative that was sexually assaulted. The book is both funny and engaging while still being as enlightening and interesting as it needed to be and then some. 5/5 stars.
4 people found this helpful
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Thank you for this book..

Someone posted the same question that has been running through my mind since childhood. Why do the females (Not WOMEN, there is a distinct difference) stand by and defend the rapists or openly misogynist types. He could be their husband, brother, uncle, our country's leaders, etc.

The rape, beatings, (adultery) or murders can go on right under that female's nose - and she will still have that "RIDE OR DIE" mentality for him, while he basically laughs at her as well as at the victim's expense. And in some cases? She's laughing along with him.. this is so disheartening to observe, as well as experience..

Examples:

1) Daughters/Nieces who get raped and sometimes impregnated by their fathers/uncles etc. And the mother, blames the victim by calling her something that rhymes with a "cut", or something that rhymes with a "bore", etc. But it's never the husband/uncle's fault. She "asked for it" or even worse, she "seduced" him/them.. (Even though he is old enough to know better, right?)

2) Females sexually victimized in public by males who are actually with their girlfriend/wives. And if she's attractive , well, she's to blame because she had no business being pretty according to the girlfriend/wife. (Who will not OPENLY admit that the victim is beautiful).. Regardless of what she was wearing.

(On a side note: women can't win no matter how they dress. If she walks around covered from head to toe in a large burlap bag, the male will enact violence on her - well, because she made his curiosity and imagination run wild!)

3) Older women who've been in relationships who brag about how devoted their husbands are to them. Yet, when they see their husband literally chasing/stalking a young woman right in front of her - the older woman says nothing. Or she will make up an excuse for his behavior. Yes, I've had this happen, with the husband stalking me in the gym - right there in front of his wife. I had a talk with her, and she actually said: "Well, the reason why he keeps coming after you is because you look oriental." (Yes, ladies, that was another one of my usual, silent, Native American "WTF" moments)..

4) Females that find out that their "soul mate" has been screwing around on them - and instead of them confronting their 'mate' they immediately go for the easier target, by killing, maiming, or publicly fighting "the other woman".. (sometimes while the boyfriend/husband stands there grinning.) Jerry Springer got a lot ratings on his show for the "girl-fights". And yes, replete with hair pulling, swearing, tearing off blouses with the crowd cheering.. (yeah, she deserved to get beat up on national TV, over a creature with a gut, flat butt and a grin, that looks like something cat puked up)..

5) Ladies that come to the gym to workout ONLY... Add, the mean-girls element that is in every gym, (members, staff, personal trainers), who aren't paying them any attention AT FIRST. That is.. until the boys start talking about how they admire the one who is serious - but can't seem talk to her, or distract her from her workouts. All of a sudden, that woman is a problem., by gawd. She needs to be controlled, dominated, or beaten up, and if they can get the guys to do it? They will convince them to pull a gang rape. Yes, I've seen this and physically defended other women, from this indirect bullying, from other females. I've also experienced it first hand quite a few times in my travels throughout the U.S. On one occasion, it happened in CA. Not in an impoverished area. It was at a gym in Palo Alto. I was accosted in the parking lot by 6 hyper masculine frat-boy gym members while they were in their car. 3 white females (front desk clerks) watched while standing in front of the gym with their arms crossed, looking on. Hoping, the males would be successful in "putting me in my place." This was no accident. It was planned by both parties. I fought off the attackers who tried to drag me in through the car window. I fell down backwards, then got up and looked in the direction of those 3 females? They were standing there with their mouths open, (and their eyes bulging) - Two of them ran right back into the gym. The third one took off down the street. I ran in after the two, to ask them call the cops, (we didn't have cell phones at that time), they where no where to be found.

6) The females who barely know a guy. And the moment someone says something about that male's sexual misconduct - the female will jump to their defense, as if they have known him their whole lives. Where as if that female was ever violated by the opposite gender? That male would avoid her.

All i can say? These examples are some of the reasons why males (Not MEN, let alone a GENTLEMAN) will say with absolute certainty that females are 'stupid'.. and i don't think they use the word "females" they actually use a word that rhymes with a witch.

In all of my 50+ years, i've lost so much faith in our gender to immediately come to the defense (physically) or even emotionally. They've learned this interesting concept of "self preservation at all costs".. To align with something they believe is more powerful, financially and physically than their own gender is a way of survival. (Melania tRump is a prime example) It always has been and i'm beginning to believe, it always will be their way of surviving..
1 people found this helpful
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GOOD RESEARCH, GREAT POINTS

Rape is scary, but worse has been society's excuses for the rapist. The author shows how this is changing, far too slowly.