Band of Sisters: American Women at War in Iraq

As a military wife with a sister (amongst several other family members) in the military, and a daughter who's been telling me since she was 3yrs that she wants to be a soldier when she grows up, I sincerely wanted to like this book. Half way through it, however, I am so disgusted I cannot turn another page.
But before I go into the book--thank you, to all the service women for their sacrifice and service to their country. You are amazing.

From the very get-go the author bashes Republicans for not pushing through legislation to authorize women to be on the Front Lines of combat, even though the debate is very hot and both sides have legitimate arguments that need to be thoughtfully considered.

In the very first story the male grunts are demonized, said to be "glaring" and almost sneering at the women just for being there. I'm not saying this never happens, but has anybody ever asked WHY?

Could it possibly be that men in American society are taught to act differently in the presence of women out of RESPECT, and they don't want to have to worry about that when their minds are just trying to focus on coping with the toxic environment (as Col. Grossman calls it) of combat? Maybe worrying about conduct in front of a respected female counterpart is just added pressure (and they resent that and take it out on the wrong person)?
Or, because many women are not a part of the group and are "attached" or moved around where they are needed for a while, maybe Tribal Order dictates that all new-comers (men AND women) prove themselves first?
Maybe I don't know what I'm talking about, but at least I paused to ask these questions--which the author of this book clearly did not do before portraying the men negatively for their "sexist" behavior.

It's easy to discern where the voice of the author interjects in the stories. The common theme from the women running through all the stories is one of "at first we had to prove ourselves, and most of the time the higher-ups were just doing what they thought was right, and in the end we were all equal." Great examples! And the women themselves explain that usually any scrutiny they are initially under is because of the perception that women want to be treated as "special". I've seen these types of women in the military myself, and it's a fair argument from the men.

The topic of Assault comes up a lot, but not in the way you'd think. Instead of empowering women by talking about a real issue to be considered before making the choice to join the military, the author makes weak arguments for assault not being a big deal to consider in allowing women into combat--

1. Author's Argument : "Because men can be assaulted too"
--I'm NOT by ANY means saying it's not as serious as when it happens a man, but it's different anatomy. Furthermore, to imply that men and women get assaulted Equally is simply untrue. Women have always been more likely to be assaulted (read the statistics), and a woman is probably more likely to be assaulted by ALL of her captors. Again, there are facts to be looked at here that the author doesn't even acknowledge.

2.The "I know I can be assaulted but that's THEIR problem" argument.
--Ok. So, as long as *I'M* ok with it then I should be able to do whatever I want. I mean, who cares what my kids, my husband, my parents, and for that matter society as a whole, thinks! It's all about ME--Right? (I defy anyone to tell me that isn't Feminist Agenda.)

3.If that isn't bad enough, the author goes on to justify the threat of assault by
listing all the OTHER methods prisoners of war are tortured by, including finger-nail pulling, beatings,and (Calling all GITMO-haters) SLEEP DEPRIVATION. What's assault compared to sleep deprivation? Right?

4.This is the Best One! The author then goes on to cite instances in WW1 and WW2 in
which female POW's were not only NOT assaulted, but actually treated BETTER than the men BECAUSE they were women.
--I'm sorry. I thought we were fighting the Taliban in a part of the world renowned for their hateful treatment of their own women, let alone the ones with guns who come to stop them from getting away with it. Yeah, our women will get BETTER treatment and they'll just assault our men. Ok.

The author is entitled to her opinion; but get the facts straight and at least make an argument worth reading! And you don't empower women by hiding the facts, either.

None of this would be so bad if it weren't for the way the rest of the book goes. When the author isn't pushing her agenda, the stories play out like a Harlequin Romance novel. Yes, really. The author uses such clichés as "on that fateful day...", and carries on Epic-Emotional-Build-Up line after line before (finally!) getting to the point.

Obviously, the author doesn't just let the women speak for themselves. She plays up the political agenda she interjects throughout the book, taking advantage of every opportunity to do so. What the author does is build up and play upon the area where there was any negativity at all--even if that negativity was taken care of and no longer an issue because of the choices and actions of these great women and the men who took bullets for them.
In several stories the author goes on and on with: "but WILL they accept her? Or WILL she be held back?" etc, before getting to the point, that yes, They were accepted! and no they weren't held back!

I just don't think this book does the service women who have worked so hard to "Just Be Equal", justice-- Which is disappointing because the insight and experiences of war as seen through a woman's eyes, and the insight into the daily life and problems of the Iraqi women whom they help, is amazing. Unfortunately much of that is lost or interrupted in this book.

Women naturally talk about their feelings, but the author's own added emotions are too much sap, taking away from the Courage of these women and putting the FOCUS on all the times they cried or felt scared. Taking away from their Compassion and putting the Focus on the Romance and Politics.

Bottom Line: the author takes away from all that is best about these women-soldiers and puts all her focus on things that give women in the military a bad rap, which is counter-productive to the very cause the author claims to be fighting for--Which makes me think this is more about her agenda.

I am so sorry to be writing a less than glowing review but had expected something else when I purchased the book. I ordered the book without even looking at any reviews and I am sorry for that. I thought I saw a book about women in the military that was current as compared to my experience. I served during the Vietnam era. I thought I'd get an up to date perspective on my experience from long ago. I often avoid books and movies about women in the military since they usually are so inaccurate, it's not enjoyable. But when I saw this book I just ordered it in anticipation of hearing from the service members themselves. I believe that was the intent of the author.

I agree with other reviewers regarding the poor writing. Yes I am complaining bitterly because it's a pain to read. Are editors in short supply? The most talented authors still have editors. In spite of that it's still worth reading if you can get past the clumsy and immature writing. As I read I thought I had a young adult book and wondered if this was aimed at youngsters to encourage more women to volunteer.

When I volunteered for the service the recruiter openly laughed at me when I asked if I'd ever be able to serve on board ship. He dismissively told me there are no women (on board ship) in this man's navy and never will be. But within a few years of my discharge women had started serving on board some ships. I was encouraged to read in this book that ships are now being built to "accommodate" women crew members. Knowing what I know, that means leaving out the urinals, nothing more.

I also agree with one reviewer who acknowledged that some of the poor quality of presentation by the author may be attributed to the writers lack of personal experience in the military. It's a very intense experience that changes you, hopefully for the better. I don't chat about my military experience with non veterans. Being a woman, most people over the years never guess that I am a veteran.

It's not too late for more editing and reissue of this book.

Wow! This is a tear jerker for everyone! Army, Navy, Air Force and Marine (mostly Marine) - all can find someone here. Pilot, driver, nurse, etc.

If you want to know what it's really like over there (and take it from me!), read Band of Sisters.

OK, I wasn't really there - I was in Afghanistan instead but I still could identify with all but the fliers in this book. The weather was the same, the jobs are the same, women soldiers 'inspected' the Iraqi/Afghanistan women because the US military men were not permitted to, etc.

The language and words used were simple, curt and to the point - just like in the military. Very few compound sentences and even fewer complex sentences. You really felt as if you were there. Black and white. (Actually, beige, but, I digress.)

The chapters were well-written to keep you in suspense even though you knew how each chapter would end. If you read the last few paragraphs of a chapter like I did, you still will be riveted by the story from the beginning.

One thing did strike me, though. Each woman had something to prove and I have not found that to be so in my 25 years in the military, even being deployed.

The cover photo of Marines shows exactly what the sand was like. I now know how to explain it to friends - I'll show them this book. (Someone once told me to say it was like moon dust, but since I have never been on the moon and neither have my friends and family in the States, I didn't like that analogy. I used 'powdered sugar' instead.)

I actually thought the author had served in the 'sandbox,' it was all so real. However, I believe her MA was in creative non-fiction (now, what is that?) She obviously has a world of respect for military women.

I found a couple of words that were spelled incorrectly, which is inexcusable (one was 'template/tamplate') and for this reason I could not give 5 stars. Also the photos seemed out of order and there were more photos of some of the women than of others, as well as photos of women who were not profiled (and of Ollie North who seems to get his photo everywhere!)

Others have commented that the women seem flat and one-dimensional. This is to be expected in a combat zone where you have one job - to protect your buddy (whose job is to protect you) by doing what you have to do. The stress is overwhelming at times and never really lets up. You live 24/7 with people you would probably not choose to live with back home. The job is one-dimensional. Your life is one-dimensional, 24/7. It just doesn't let up.

I certainly relived my training clearing houses and my convoy experiences. The author successfully translates military jargon and weapons into words and stories and pictures that even my mother could understand.

What was especially telling to me was reading the introduction and the snippets about the women interviewed who decided not to allow their stories in the book - for some, their experiences were still too recent and raw.

Some of the chapters were of only one incident, others were of daily life over many months to give you an idea of what it was like. Some chapters were stronger than others, especially the beginning ones. I would have preferred each story to be just as riveting as the next, however. The book seemed to drop off in excitement as I read on. However, you can finish it in one or two days!

Now I am waiting for a book to come out about the US military women in Afghanistan!

After reading Chris Kyle's book I was on the path to continue reading books on the Iraqi war and the idea of learning more about women's roles intrigued me. There are several different sections of the book, each focusing on an individual and her stories of her involvement in the military be it a pilot, a medic, or crew on a navy air craft carrier. The stories told of hard earned achievements, their struggles to be included among the men as equals, and their emotions involving killing the enemy or losing a friend in the war.

Overall, I really wanted to like this book. I enjoyed reading the personal stories but I found the writing style to be very lacking. Maybe it was because I had just finished Chris's journalistic-style book, but without the first person viewpoint it felt a bit ho-hum and didn't have the intensity or keep-me-hooked emotional draw. At one point I even pulled up the title on amazon to see if this book was intended for a younger audience. The author tries to oversimplify some of the content yet, the following sentence uses words that are very technical. It became frequently annoying to me.

For example Holmstedt would write a sentence then immediately explain the meaning in excruciating child-like detail: "This is where.....". Or she would put the meaning of a word such as scapula in parenthesis "(shoulder blade)" but then the following sentences will include terminology such as "combitube" without further explanation. In my humble opinion, I wanted her to stop treating the reader like a simpleton and just use the big words without further ado. If I don't know what a word means I've a dictionary or the internet nearby. I think I learned that little technique in grade-school.

In Chris's book he types out abbreviations and gives a very quick run-down to their meaning. He doesn't insult the reader by treating them like an ignorant bumble-footed idiot.

Secondly, for as much research as Holmstedt states she did, delving into friends and family of soldiers, therapists, doctors, etc. Her writing failed to perform and thoroughly draw you in to the female soldiers. I did not feel like I knew them very well, the paragraphs offering just loose tidbits of information, and the author force feeding us frequent melodramatic comments about how dangerous so-and-so's job was instead of allowing the reader to come to their own conclusions. The author's recounting of the war stories made me feel like I was at a distance peering in from a hazy window, instead of right by that crackling campfire, breath held in anticipation as I listened to each soldier share her life-altering events.

Finally, it was a bit confusing (irritating?) to hear the fact that women in the military craved to be treated like equals, that some women refused to tell their stories because they didn't want to be viewed differently from their male counterparts, and each woman had to prove herself to her team. Yet, the stories included unique habits, emotions, and hurdles that women had during their deployment. Let's face it...women are different than men and there shouldn't be a struggle to attempt to hide or blur this. It doesn't mean that women are any more or less of a soldier than a man is, they are just simply put: different.Yes, I am all for equality to a point, but don't ignore or glaze over differences as if it is a bad thing. People can be different and still find a way to achieve the same challenging task with just as much greatness.

I do not regret reading this book, however, I felt this book could have soared if it had only been written by each soldier (edited for content and smoothness of reading, of course) and read in a first person point-of-view. Written as is, this book does an injustice to the female soldiers and their stories.

As one who leads a life surrounded by military members and veterans, I was aggravated at the tone of voice. Since it was written by a journalist, I expected the voice to be mostly objective with SOME subjective content. However, the first couple of chapters contained phrases assuming how the subject felt or thought - and they were thoughts and feelings most military and veterans wouldn't have thought and felt. I felt it impacted the credibility. Couldn't finish it.

Because of the topic of this book (women in the military serving in active combat roles for the first time in American history), I wanted to be able to give this book five stars. And let me be clear, the topic itself deserves five stars.

Unfortunately, I just didn't find the story-telling as interesting as I would have liked. I am quite sure that these are passionate, fiery, fascinating women . . . but the stories just weren't.

After reading about one-third of the book, I determined to grit my teeth and power through it, but I still only got half-way before I had to put it down for a bit. I finished the rest by reading one chapter here and another there. Fortunately, each chapter is a self-contained story so I was able to do so.

I commend the author for identifying an important and timely topic and doing some great research, which I am sure wasn't always easy to do given the busy and mobile lifestyle of her subjects.

I just wish I could say that I loved the book as much as I loved the idea of the book.

I encourage anyone who still believes that women are not fighting in combat to read this book. Women have always been in combat, but finally an author has the courage to write a REAL depiction of what women in the military endure. As a female Marine veteran, I am so proud of our women in service today.

Like any good writer determined to accurately validate her thesis, Holmstedt's in-depth interviews with active members of the military show the civilian population and others who are curious-- how American women fare in combat situations. We learn how proficient and professional today's troops are, and what compelled these women to join combat forces. Though the reasons were as varied as their personalities, the common denominator seemed to be love of country and deep concern for the brothers and sisters whose backs they pledged to cover. In the Kindle version, unfortunately, many of the photographs were obviously mislabeled. As an author who has also written about effect of combat on troops and their families (Vietnam war), I understand the emotional toll such an undertaking requires of a writer. I thank Holmstedt for her service, commend her for sharing what she learned with us, and applaud her dedication to this project.

I was lucky enough to get this book free on my Kindle ap on my Droid phone, but am going to buy the written version for my daughter to read. I have immense pride in the women featured in this book, and am sure there are many others who also served our country well in Iraq and Afghanistan. It was very interesting reading of their many different experiences, and I especially liked reading about the work done on the aircraft carrier. Well worth reading! There are plenty of reviews of this book, so I won't make this long - just read it!

My daughter just finished two years training to become a Naval Aviator. As a helicopter pilot I guess that she'll be in situations similar to those of the women interviewed for this book. It's a little scary to think about, but also reassuring to see how the military has prepared our young women to fulfill roles which no one else could. The accounts are well written and engaging, giving me a feeling for things my daughter will face, but would be hesitant to discuss with us.

I appreciate that Holmstedt took on this project, and that her interviewees were willing to relive events from their personal experiences.

This is a well written book which gives an important perspective on the military and modern warfare.