Forgive for Good: A Proven Prescription for Health and Happiness

From Publishers Weekly Forgiving doesn't mean forgetting, insists Fred Luskin in Forgive for Good: A Proven Prescription for Health and Happiness, nor does it mean condoning bad behavior. What it does mean is that you "take your hurt less personally, take responsibility for how you feel, and become a hero instead of a victim in the story you tell." Luskin, a practicing psychologist and cofounder of the Stanford University Forgiveness Project, shows why forgiveness is important for mental and physical health, explains how to form a grievance and suggests practical steps for healing. He uses examples from his clinical practice including instances of broader cultural grievances like those between Protestants and Catholics in Northern Ireland in this solidly researched and convincing guide. Copyright 2001 Cahners Business Information, Inc. From Booklist To forgive may be divine, according to Alexander Pope, but it is hardly easy. How do you forgive a hit-and-run driver, a boss who makes life unbearable, or a cheating spouse? Luskin says not only can you forgive such people but that for your own good mental and physical health, you must. The author is careful to make the distinction between forgiveness and condoning actions, forgetting them, or reconciling with the offender, all or some of which may not be possible. He says that over time we build up "grievances" against others on which we obsess and that make it impossible to get on with our lives. It is only through forgiveness that we can let go of the grievance, stop playing the role of victim, and move on. Through case studies, he indicates how we build up grievances and how they can block our happiness. He then describes the HEAL method of forgiveness, which stands for Hope, Educate, Affirm, and Long-term. Good practical advice for a very difficult task. Marlene Chamberlain Copyright © American Library Association. All rights reserved “Simply the best book on the subject.” — Michael Murphy, Co founder Esalen Institute Bestselling Author of Future of the Body, Golf in the Kingdom “Forgive For Good is an accessible and practical guide to learning the power of forgiveness.” — John Gray, Ph.D., author ofMen Are from Mars, Women Are from Venus “I have read many books about forgiveness; this one is by far the best.” — Rabbi Harold S. Kushner, author of When Bad Things Happen to Good People “A practical and readable book that is bound to be of great help.” — Lewis Smedes, bestselling author of Forgive and Forget “...one of the most helpful, practical, scientifically documented, books on forgiveness that I have ever read.” — Gerald G. Jampolsky, M.D., Author of Forgiveness: The Greatest Healer of All “A remarkable and essential book that is sure to become the gold standard.“ — Kenneth Pelletier, Ph.D, M.D., Clinical Professor of Medicine, University of Maryland School of Medicine and University of Arizona and author of The Best Alternative Medicine: What Works? What Does Not? “Good practical advice for a very difficult task.” — Booklist “[A] solidly researched and convincing guide.” — Publishers Weekly “Straightforward, sincere and essential, I recommend this book highly.” — Dave Pelzer, New York Times and International best-selling author of A Child Called It and Help Yourself “Luskin has the potential to do for forgiveness what John Gray (”Mars and Venus”) did for relationships.” — Chicago Tribune Fred Luskin, Ph.D. is the author of Forgive for Good and one of the world's leading researchers and teachers on the subject of forgiveness. He is the director of the Stanford Forgiveness Project, a series of research projects that investigate forgiveness methods. He holds an appointment at the Stanford Center on Conflict and Negotiation as a senior fellow and is an associate professor at the Institute of Transpersonal Psychology. He lives in Palo Alto, California. Read more