How to Make a French Family: A Memoir of Love, Food, and Faux Pas

I just finished reading Samantha Vérant’s “How to Make a French Family” and enjoyed it even more than I did her first book, “Seven Letters from Paris: A Memoir.” She is an excellent writer and shares her experiences with humor and with insight. The warmth of her personality comes through even better in this sequel, and her descriptions of her new life in France with her French husband and his two children are fascinating; they answered the questions I had been left with after closing the covers of her first book. Vérant is frank in her discussions of the major adjustments she had to make: new husband, new adolescent children, new country, and a new language. Although she had taken French in school many years prior, it didn’t prepare her for the challenges of speaking it every day in all of her interactions with friends, neighbors, tradespeople, and new family members. Her learning curve was steep, but she persevered and won through.

Equally the cultural differences were a hurdle, and for a while she felt isolated despite the support of her children and her husband. The turning point happened when she reached out and developed a small group of fellow expats, several of whom also had French spouses. Together they were able to compare experiences and to recognize that what they were feeling was totally normal, and to move forward with each other’s help.

I very much admired Vérant’s ability to cope, to see situations from all angles, to reach out to her step-children and empathize with them, and to rise to the challenges she faced as she came to feel fully comfortable and at home with her new family.

Disclaimer: I was given an advance copy of this book in exchange for an honest review.

I was sent an ARC by Net Galley in advance of Samantha Vérant's new memoir launch in April 2017.

Loved this so much I bought my own copy. It's beautifully honest and makes you want to track down the author and give her a big hug. Samantha Vérant's first memoir, SEVEN LETTERS FROM PARIS left us feeling a teensy bit envious of her new-found love in France with the guy of her dreams... well the dream gets real real quick in this sequel. Yet it is a story chock full of warmth, humor, love, light as well as some extremely sad moments... and I didn't want it to end. It brought me to tears yet left me with tons of delicious-sounding recipes. There were family parties and some family devastation... and a lot of fleas.

A wonderful gift of a book that is both life-affirming and down-to-earth.

Please keep writing what is in your heart because it's as bitter-yet-sweet as cherry clafoutis and as warming as boeuf bourguignon.

Beautiful, heartwarming story that shows both sides of the coin: Samantha had a second chance at life and love when she reconnected with sexy man extraordinaire (and rocket scientist to boot!) Jean Luc, 20 years after first meeting him in Paris when she was a college student in the late 1980's. Most romance stories are wrapped up with an "And they lived happily ever after" ending, which, although mostly satisfying, can also feel very incomplete.

In How To Make a French Family, Samantha tells us about her trials and tribulations as she dealt with culture shock when she moved from Los Angeles to rural France; the frustrations that came with having to learn a new language, dealing with immigration paperwork, being so far away from her family, becoming an instant stepmother (including to a moody teenager), making new friends on the other side of the world, and dealing with heartbreak within the confines of an otherwise happy life (spoiler alert: she had several miscarriages. And I'm not stating so here to ruin the story for you; but because it has happened to many women who might find solace and comfort reading about somebody else who've also experienced it).

The road to happiness is seldom a straight line. Sam shows us how she took each sudden turn and rocky patch with grace; and how, even when things got tough, being surrounded by love made everything better.

With this book, you will laugh out loud, you will cry, you will learn about southwestern France, and you will get a long list of amazing recipes. I highly recommend this book to any francophile, or to anyone who loves chick lit or memoirs; and definitely to anyone who loves to cook fancy dishes.

I am a total Francophile, so I was drawn to this book from the title and description. I was expecting Eat, Pray, Love, except with French food instead of Italian, and that's almost what I got. Almost.
First, the positives: Samantha Vérant's story is a lovely fairy tale, complete with Prince Charming in the form of Jean-Luc, with whom she reconnects after 20 years, and the mostly-French setting is vividly depicted, with all the baguettes, escargot, and red wine you could want. My favorite parts are Samantha's forays into the local markets or chance meetings with neighbors. These encounters are filled with the awkwardness you might expect from a non-native French speaker, but at the same time a determined optimism that makes you root for Samantha and her new family. She happily overturns the stereotype that the French are grumpy snobs who hate expats in general and Americans in particular.
Now for the part I didn't enjoy so much: the light tone and constant happy banter give the book a surface-only feel, with none of the vulnerability you would expect from, say, a Mary Karr memoir, or even Elizabeth Gilbert, who is not afraid of self-examination. You can tell that Vérant is being very careful to protect the privacy of her young stepdaughters, which is understandable, if confusing once you've decided to write a memoir. She also has no desire to spill the tea on the romantic side of her relationship with Jean-Luc, which is a little disappointing in a book whose subject is rekindling a romance after a 20-year gap since their first steamy affair. The closest allusion to romance is when Vérant confides Jean-Luc's belief that they never fight because they are like bonobo chimpanzees, who apparently "have sex to keep conflict and violence out of their lives. Make love, not war! And that's all I have to say on the subject." Well, okay, understandable, but again, maybe don't choose to write a memoir then.
Instead of delving deep into feelings and motivations, Vérant tends to rely on metaphors that range from tired to cringe-worthy. Her description of being a step-mother: "I was trying to put my best foot forward, but kept tripping." When the family visits the ruined fortress of Chateau de Montségur, "history came alive. One could almost hear the battle cries, the sounds of swords clanging against one another, the hooves of galloping horses." And a kind remark from her new in-laws means, she "was on a roll, or rather, a baguette." Yikes.
I recommend this book for anyone who might be a fellow Francophile or who likes a generous helping of French recipes scattered throughout the story. Don't expect a gritty analysis of life as a stepparent or a Fifty Shades of Gris description of romance, and you won't be disappointed. You will enjoy this book if you are looking for a fun, lighthearted romp about moving to the south of France with your international Study Abroad lover. Charming and sweet.

I enjoyed the book very much. I was happy that Samantha wrote it as I wondered how life turned out for them after reading "7 Letters".
She has a way of making you feel that you were standing there in the kitchen with them. Not an easy task to move to another country, learn to express yourself in a different language, take on 2 children in addition to an extended family plus learning the ins and outs of "how things are done". Sam let us go right along with her with nothing held back. I didn't want to reach the end of the book. Nice of her to share recipes with us as well!

Sweet. This best describes this book. A sweet story, written in a sweet way. Won't win any prizes for literature. Just like this review.

How to Make a French Family is a truly charming and engaging memoir that will delight your inner francophile! Samantha Vérant recounts what it was like to adapt to her new marriage to a french rocket scientist and her life in France with the cultural differences and language challenges this has entailed. She writes of love, family, travel, stepmotherhood, friendship, overcoming loss and linguistic landmines. Her heartwarming story makes for a wonderful read with the added bonus of tried-and-true recipes that are far too tempting to pass up. A book not to be missed!

Disclaimer: I was given an advance copy of this book in exchange for an honest review.

Very nice and funny!

memoir about adjusting life in France not very iinterestly written. Loved the recipes though.

The sequel to 7 letters from Paris and it is delightful. They marry and she moved to France to be full time wife and mother. Her efforts to master the language is hilarious at first; her love of cooking is the saving grace. Being step mother to two is often defeating, but her American grit battles it through. An absorbing read..