The Love Affairs of Nathaniel P.: A Novel

Early on in The Love Affairs of Nathaniel P., the protagonist makes the following observation: "What he didn't say--why aid the prosecution's case?--was that the kind of writing he preferred seemed inherently masculine. The writers who impressed him most weren't animated by a sense of personal grievance. (They were unlikely to, say, write poems called 'Mommy.')" In many ways, Adelle Waldman's first novel can be read as a response to this (I'm willing to wager) fairly widely-held if rarely spoken literary-male sense of what "women's writing" is; a sense that Waldman, with consummate intelligence and sensitivity, responds to with something much more interesting than mere refutation. She has written the most elegant and fair-minded novel animated by personal grievance imaginable.

This gesture seems to me characteristic of what Waldman does throughout Love Affairs, which, though it risks, in its subtlety, being dismissed as chick lit, or maybe worse, a kind of Brooklyn-hipster-chicklit (see the godawful NPR review for this kind of shameful misreading) has to be read in the tradition in which Waldman is so evidently well-schooled: the 19th-century novel of manners. Like Austen she is nowhere stylistically flashy and everywhere in perfect command of her prose. Perhaps more significantly, though, Waldman is committed to a kind of sympathetic and clear-eyed presentation of Nate. The book is no mere exposé of the familiar irony that the "sensitive guy" is often nevertheless kind of a schmuck. What stings is the fact that Nate really *is* a pretty good guy, and his frequent, borderline-misogynist observations about women (like the one above) are never entirely devoid of truth; indeed, Waldman shows us not only Nate's squirminess, but makes us feel it, makes even a female reader who identifies with Hannah, as so many of us will, feel the way she inadvertently triggers Nate's growing sense of claustrophobia. The result of this balancing act is that the moments when Nate really is awful--and he is, sometimes, rather awful--it is disappointment and sadness that one feels, rather than righteous indignation. In this way, in every way, it is a highly disciplined novel; Waldman never goes for the easy laugh--that kind of dismissiveness always shown to be a kind of moral failure.

In the end, this is the aspect of the book that most impressed me: the fact that it is an unabashedly moral book without ever being priggish or preachy. Waldman looks long and hard at the source of Hannah's grievance, with sympathy that neither obscures her clarity of vision nor lapses into caricature.

I really hated this book. I won't reiterate the plot, as you can read previous reviews for that. I just couldn't stand the characters' narcissism, arrogance, and condescension. Their dinner party conversation personified all my least favorite character traits. I didn't finish this book, although I kept trying. I just didn't want to spend any more time with these people! I know this review is all about my not liking the characters, and that's unusual for me. Normally, I can appreciate literature even when the characters are unlikeable. The author does know her way around a sentence, but perhaps the characters are just too one-dimensional.

I heard a review of this book on NPR and it sounded brilliant. Having lived in Brooklyn with an aspiring writer turned high school teacher, I thought the characters' woes would resonate with me. Wrong. The protagonist is a shallow and self-absorbed ass who thinks only of sex. The female characters, despite their beauty and brains, are depicted as clingy and desperate. I finished this book only because it isn't very long, then regretted the waste of my time.

Nate is a freelance writer living in Brooklyn. Harvard educated, the son of overachieving immigrants, Nate's first novel is soon to be published. After years of scraping by on temp jobs and freelance writing, his newfound success promises wonderful new opportunities both professional and personal. Despite some insight into the professional lives of young, hungry writers living in New York, "The Love Affairs of Nathaniel P." naturally focuses primarily on Nate's love life. Broader, it comments on the different attitudes of men and women toward relationships and their evolution with age.

The plot is exceedingly (overly) simple which may be the book's primary deficiency. Nate has an uncomfortable run-in with an ex-lover while he's on the way to another ex-grilfriend's dinner party. At the dinner party, which carries suggestive overtones from his ex, he's particularly impressed by another young lady. Although he soon begins dating her, another girl, also the recipient of a lucrative publishing contract, is waiting in the wings. The book explores Nate's mindset toward girls and relationships from high school through his most recent failed relationships and on to those as yet on the horizon. It also uses his ex-girlfriends, love interests, and friends and their banter to illustrate contemporary views on love and relationships.

Nate is obviously intelligent and talented. He may not be drop-dead gorgeous, but he's not hard on the eyes either. Awkward as a teenager, he's come into his own and has admirable success with the fairer sex. He's a liberal-hearted, sensitive young man who respects women and is moved by the plight of the underprivileged. Despite his educational and PC trappings, though, he's still pretty much a neurotic, self-absorbed heel. This is the novel's other challenge. Maybe the Brooklyn literati will see much of themselves in the protagonist, but one hopes not. Despite his education, despite his success, despite his intellect, he behaves like a child. In the principle relationship targeted by the novel, he fulfills every stereotype of the typical male who suffers from fear of commitment. As the newness wears off of his latest conquest, as her luster wanes and the passions cool, suddenly he notices physical imperfections that put him off. He uses his considerable mental faculties to manipulate her and justify his own cold and distant behavior. After a rough break up, he rounds up sympathetic exes and friends who will excuse his behavior and stroke his ego. He's not malicious, just immature. He's not despicable, but he's not likable either.

The author's signature achievement is ostensibly that she expertly represents the male psyche (if you believe the gushing praise of other authors). But the mindset presented is all stereotype and tired cliché, there's no impressive psychological insight or ground-breaking revelations. Is it really remarkable to portray commonly-held perceptions about the opposite gender?

The writing was generally good. The author did do a commendable job of revealing the mind of her protagonist. Despite his flaws, he's fully rendered (even if he is shallow). There was a problem, however, with his development over the course of his final relationship. Suddenly, in a dubious display of maturity, he can deal with his partner's idiosyncrasies and imperfections. The only possible explanation offered is that he found the right partner. Perhaps this really is the fundamental, wonder-working difference, but it left me unconvinced. The pacing was also labored and plodding at times. I was frequently bored particularly in the early stages of the novel. Perhaps to pad the page count there was a little too much in the way of trivial detail - dinner guests circling a table and smiling "beatifically" and bracelets disappearing below sleeves as elbows are placed on tables, etc.

"The Love Affairs of Nathaniel P." may uniquely appeal to the literary set in New York (how big is that market?). They may recognize enough of themselves in the characters and their exploits to be entertained. Others will find a relatively interesting if unoriginal deconstruction of a doomed love-affair. Sadly, aside from finding the right "one", there's not much advice offered on making relationships work.

I often judge a novel by how long it "stays with me" and The Love Affairs is one such novel. In truth, I cannot quite shake the ending. There are just not enough novels like this one. It's a true character-driven thought piece and so elegantly and insightfully written that I find it hard to believe that the author could so seamlessly inhabit such a varied set of true to life character interiors. The novel is almost Victorian in this regard and I would read her next book in a heartbeat because of how few works of fiction today satisfy a reader in quite this manner.

That's not to say the book is ponderous. I absolutely tore through the first third. The characters and the novel are fabulously evocative and fascinating. During the middle third I was fascinated, disgusted and pitying of dear Nate and I sometimes needed a break from him. I just reached a point where I felt too close to the experience and yet somehow removed. As many reviewers say, you find yourself squirming in recognition. I also found myself relieved that I don't live this challenging "dating life" anymore! The final third really moved and was moving, too. A real, artful study of character and, again, the ending just knocked the wind out of me in the way only a truly great novel can. We just lose ourselves and some, like Nate, never find.

I just couldn't get past how unlikable the main character was- I found it so trying to read his never ending thoughts about how girls are rarely deep and almost always unreasonable- I felt the author was trying a little too hard to recreate a machismo persona- maybe would have liked it for a short story but night after night I almost barfed on my pillow reading the things that came out of Nate's mouth.

Uninspired writing and unsympathetic/uninteresting main character. I read the entire book, hoping it would get better, but it did not.

Like the best performances of Chekhov plays,The Love Affairs of Nathaniel P. achieves a masterful balance of sympathy, insight, beauty, and pride among its characters, so that you'll be on the edge of your seat the entire time you read it. This is not to find out "who did it" but "what is right". A completely satisfying book, both an absorbing novel of modern love and non-love and a subtly important exploration of what it means to be sensitive, privileged, and sensitively privileged, it is book for anyone who wants to better understand what it means to be alive today. Rarely will books combine the wit, sharp writing, and pentrating insight, but even more rarely will characters stay with you for months and make you think again and again about your own ambition, morals, ability to love, and every relationship you have ever had.

The characters in this book are vomit inducing! They are so pretentious! I imagine that if I met them in real life, I'd probably chew off my own leg at mid thigh to get away from them and their elitist, arrogant, and hateful banter. They refer to Christian people who didn't attend an Ivy League college as "grits" to mean that they are just hicks that don't get to be in Club Literati. I'm not Christian, but Im still offended by this. This smug book is just propaganda not a modern day love story. It's simply oozing with the darkest of hatred toward humanity.

Set in the NYC literary world of young up-and-coming journalists, editors, reviewers, writers, etc, this short, provocative novel explores the psychological drama and difficulties of not only making it professionally in a highly competitive world, but also in selling one's self in the relationship game. The central character is Nathaniel P, a thirty-something writer of modest appearance, who has slowly achieved visibility with not only a series of short pieces but also with a book for which he has received a healthy advance. The author's focus in this novel is on the nature of relationships among this young intellectual set; Nathan is exhibit number one.

It goes without saying that members of this urbane set are well educated, well read, witty, informed, etc, but that is only for starters. Potential partners are subjected to withering scrutiny: the slightest flaw, whether it be looks, speech, dress, mannerisms, and the like, can quickly downgrade one's desirability. The game is played by all: males and females. However, money and/or success can be a trump card. In fact, Nathan, already known for "intellectual cachet," with a book soon to be published, increasingly gets attention and suggestive smiles at social events. But his newfound attractiveness seems to only make his life more complicated.

The author truly gets into the thinking of Nathan as he constantly evaluates and reevaluates his work, his current relationships, and his future course of action. It seems that he is incapable of truly being happy. The women that he has relationships with are an incredible bunch: cool, sexy, smart, independent, and supportive - what more could he want. Yet he cannot avoid the aforementioned pickiness, even with "perfect" Hannah. He sees himself undermining relationships for no justifiable reasons; and his women are helpless against his neurotic behavior.

Although there are numerous semi-long introspective passages, the book is fascinating in attempting to capture what makes this crowd tick. Overall, the author's writing is very engaging. Her focus is on Nathan, but it is being suggested that his tormented behavior is hardly unique. One can possibly see that female readers could have a problem with the author's characterization of women. If a chick is going to make it in this world, she had best be smart, but also hot and able to project sexiness in some manner. All of the characterizations are probably overstated, but the world the author describes seems like fun, if one can qualify - a big if.