What the Dog Did: Tales from a Formerly Reluctant Dog Owner

Emily Yoffe is an incredibly funny writer. Her tales of adventure/misadventure with her beagle had me laughing so hard I had tears in my eyes and had to clutch my belly in pain. I read this book on a plane flight and the person in the next seat surely thought I was out of my mind. It's not solely the hijinx of the beagle that are funny but the writer's thoughts and her descriptions of her life and actions that remind me of what it was like to be a new dog owner. Some of the other reviews that rated the book poorly picked out certain anecdotes in the book that the reviewers didn't find funny but I think if you read it with a light heart and memories of your first dog, anyone else will find it incredibly entertaining and hysterically funny too.

This was by no means a perfect book. Ms. Yoffe's writing pace drags at times through tedious mawkishness over this or that adorable or precious thing that her perpetually incontinent dog has done. The book reads as I'm sure it was intended to - as a coffee table discussion among friends trading anecdotes over the things our pets do that are perplexing, hilarious, strangely human. For me, as a recent first time dog owner the story hits more often than misses. There are dozens of 'drop the book laughing' moments where I either see myself as the same sort of clueless pet owner as she or thank God above I don't have as high maintenance an animal as a beagle in my care. We're all human. We don't have it all figured out. As American humans, we most often don't even care to figure it all out before leaping into life changing situations much to our personal detriment. C'est la vie. Somehow, both we and our pets mostly find a way to soldier on despite our utter lack of competence at living life perfectly. This book's best quality is to show us our own ridiculous behavior in the context of funny dog stories and then smile at it. It's not War and Peace, folks. Just a funny book about being a dog owner. Take a breath and don't flame the funny dog story telling lady.

Being a confirmed dog lover I was really looking forward to reading this book. After I read all the positive reviews, I was even more enthused.

Now I have the book and am about 1/4 of the way through it. I'm having a hard time being motivated to continue reading it.

Perhaps what turned me off the most was the chapter about the authors' sister who owned two out-of-control, untrained, dog- and-human-aggressive canines. The author casually mentions that her sister once had to race out and grab one of the attack-dogs before it killed a small dog out for a walk in the neighborhood. The story continues on about how the dogs have multiple health issues, including anal gland problems that apparently rendered the sister's home uninhabitable.

Maybe it's because I have smaller size dogs myself, but I see nothing funny, amusing or even slightly 'cute' about someone owning untrained, unmanageable, out-of-control attack dogs.

Maybe if I ever finish the book, I'll reach the 'charming, laugh-out-loud' parts of the book, but for right now, I'm going to find something else to read.

I absolutely loved this book! Anyone who has gone through the trials and tribulations of of dog ownership (espcially when cats are part of the family) will truly appreciate Yoffe's sense of humor. If you own, or are planning on owing, a dog you must read this book.

I was eager to purchase this book based on the enthusiastic reviews both on Amazon and in print. Imagine my disappointment when I found that I could hardly finish the book! A dedicated owner of four intelligent, well-socialized, handsome and friendly Boston Terriers I was for one thing insulted by the malicious humor used by the author to discuss her encounters with Boston Terriers. Although she claims she always wanted one, she certainly did a job of demeaning their intelligence, socialization, looks (her daughter was afraid their eyes would fall out), etc. In fact, her comments about just about every other breed were malicious and I didn't enjoy the "killer dog" stories at all. If I had a relative with dogs like that I would never tell anyone. It was a struggle to keep reading and I never did find much I felt I could "laugh out loud" about. In fact, I found myself wondering if the author really liked dogs at all. Very, very disappointing.

Two things. One, I am not a dog person. Two, there can never be too many dog books. As long as they're funny and at least somewhat informative.

Slate columnist and lifelong "cat person" Yoffe's account of how she became a dog person easily fills these requirements. It's packed with enough information to confirm a healthy resolve never to own a dog, at least not a beagle, and the self conscious are cautioned against reading it in public lest you attract stares for continuous eruptions of solitary laughter.

Yoffe starts from the lowest point of dog ownership, the night when she single handedly removed the strap of her favorite bra from the rear-end of her relieved beagle, Sasha. The chapter goes on to share stories about other canine culinary feats. One dog wolfed down the entire rubber gasket from a refrigerator in one piece; another swallowed a seven-inch knife. This latter was discovered only because the uncomplaining dog had stopped sleeping in her customary curled-up position. Sasha's special cat litter treat gets mentioned in a later chapter.

While most dogs will eat just about anything, beagles have other drawbacks. The beagle-rescue website has an upfront buyer-beware. "Getting a beagle after this was like reading about a car model in Consumer Reports: `If you want an automobile that will start reliably, requires little maintenance, runs in all kinds of weather and has a good safety record, then this model is not for you,' and then running to the dealer to put down a deposit on an Osie."

Incontinence is a recurring theme, a common trait of beagles. "When Sasha first arrived she did live up to the promise of being completely unhousebroken." Yoffe shares some truly disgusting stories - one concerns the dining room table - but even those who think scatological humor is only for boys of 12 will be howling.

Beagles are also notoriously difficult to train, meaning they prefer not to obey, and they cannot be allowed off the leash. "Sasha has made it clear that however much love and food we pour into her, if the front door is ajar for a millisecond, she will take off down the street without a farewell glance, on the scent trail of a decomposing possum, or a sewerline break."

Yoffe was pressured - guilted - into getting a dog by her husband and daughter. Her daughter's first written sentence was " `I love dogs.' " "Then she came home from kindergarten with a chart of everyone's favorite pet - hers was dog. When I mentioned she had cats, not a dog, she said, `They asked for my favorite, not what I have.' "

And so the research. Yoffe, who will be primary caretaker for this animal and knows it, takes charge from the start, treating it like a journalistic project. She looks into breeds and their histories, and ends up rescuing the neurotic, skittish, but adorable Sasha from imminent euthanasia. She collects dog stories from vets, trainers, breeders and passing strangers, visits a pet psychic, a facility that trains food-sniffing beagles for airport security and enlists Sasha in visiting nursing home invalids.

Attending a training session on psychic dog communication she struggles to achieve the required meditative state. "But as I concentrated on the thoughts of the sleeping Lulu, my mind was an utter blank. At first I felt like a failure, then I realized, this may be the mental state of a sleeping hound."

Beagles are used in airports to detect forbidden foods, like fruit and sausages. Yoffe accompanies the Beagle Brigade at work, but Sasha never strays far from her thoughts. "I tried to imagine Sasha patrolling the airport. All I could conjure up was her accidentally knocking over a toddler in order to pull a Twizzler out of the child's mouth."

Yoffe notices a strange transformation coming over her as time goes on. When she's away from home for too long she starts feeling anxious for Sasha - and it's not just fear of what havoc she may be wreaking in an empty house. "I was so far gone that I was starting to think about getting another dog. We were set up for it, we had the fence, the crates, the food. I was already a prisoner in my own home, so why not get a companion for Sasha?"

We can be sure it will make a good dog story.

I started reading this book at 10:30pm and I couldn't put it down! I usually drift off after a few minutes of reading but this book was great- hilarious and very witty. One of the best books I have read in a long time and very refreshing- a great summertime read. Read it to find out exactly "what the dog did"- you'll have some great stories to pass along to your other dog lover friends as well as around the water cooler. Just read it somewhere where people won't mind hearing chuckling, you won't be able to keep it to yourself!

I'm a fan the writing Yoffe does for Slate, but she needs to either do some serious reading about animals (or, heck, just become a regular Animal Planet viewer) or give up writing about them. Writing about your own complete ignorance ought to be embarrassing for her, and certainly wasn't entertaining for me.

I recently travelled to Asia and discovered that I knew very little about it, but I hope that I'd learn something about that part of the world before putting my limitations and irreverent assumptions in print. Yoffe did no such justice to the animal world.

The author just wrote an article bragging about how she murdered her cat. Yeah, sure, buy her book about pets - that is, if you'd like a purile, poorly written, monotonous pile of drivel, and enjoy wishing you had your money back.

I laughed, I cried.... I couldn't put it down ! the author is a good story teller whose anecdotes and stories about dog ownership keep you laughing throughout. A good book thats a must for anyone considering a pet. Begrudgingly and underneath all the humor, Yoffe shows a sentimentality for Sasha and for all dogs !